In your hometown...

Every day, hundreds of kegs of beer are put in useless storage.
Every hour, thousands of bottles of beer needlessly go untasted.
Every minute, millions of glasses for serving beer are carelessly left unfilled.

Yet, Vernon continues to go thristy.

No one with a humane heart should stand by letting this senseless tragedy go on and on. Not when a simple and easy means of rectifying such a horrid injustice lies so near at hand.

And for just a few pennies a day

That's all it takes to bring some sunny sudsy joy to a dark, careworn face; restoring vigour and optimism to the bleak archeologist's existance.

For just a few pennies a day

You'll hold a sweaty goblet of bubbly liquid gold to heat-cracked lips that only know the hot, dusty kiss of the Iowa sun.

For just a few pennies a day

Your generosity will benefit an entire community by creating jobs in brewing, bottling, distribution, and resturants; increasing the tax base for building schools, planting trees, and feeding homeless puppies.

And you'll receive monthly letters

Letters of hope and cheer. Letters describing Vernon's progress from a neglected desperate scribbling shovel bum to an inqusitive, rambunctious writer/explorer/boy scientist. Heart touching letters describing opportunites only you could help provide---for just a few pennies a day---but you must act now!

Because a keg goes untapped, a pilsner glass goes unfilled.
And Vernon goes thirsty.

back to the Classifieds