Tornado Wrecks Truck, Spills Unusual Cargo

     Driver Violates Local Decency Ordinance


Johnson: Keith Harding never intended to stop in Wyndam. He didn't know about the town's Mother Goose Children's Festival, either. And he didn't know about Wyndam's strict Decency Ordinance. But a brief encounter with a powerful tornado in the center of town the night of July 11 has given him time to learn these things in the town's jail.

     "I was taking a short-cut from I-80 to Highway 6 to get to Iowa City. I got to Wyndam about 4:45 in the morning," says the veteran 40 year old trucker. "There'd been storms all the way in from Chicago and I'd heard about a tornado warning in the area. I was rounding a corner in Wyndam when all of a sudden I thought I heard a freight train bearing down on me. Next thing I know, I'm hanging upside down from my seat looking at the sign for a church. My trailer looked like shredded lettuce in a taco!

     Police and firefighters reached the scene of the wreck a few minutes later and found Harding unhurt by the mishap. But because the storm had knocked out the power it wasn't until daybreak that the local police saw the havoc the storm had wreaked with Harding's cargo on Wyndam's Children's Festival.

     "Yeah, I was hauling what you call 'Adult Novelty Items'. I had a stop in Iowa City, then up to Zoar, and then Cedar Rapids," Harding admits. "It's really not my fault."

     The tornado ripped open Harding's trailer and littered downtown with its anatomically correct cargo. Several of the larger, more interesting items were driven through painted plywood fairytale figures set up for the Wyndam Mother Goose Children's Festival.

     Firefighter Michael Jefferies smiles sheepishly, "After we got the cab stabilized and hosed engine down with foam, it started getting light enough to see. When we saw what happened to the Three Little Pigs, we all just busted up. I mean, them big rubber dildoes was as big as your fist and two or three feet long! And there were the Three Little Pigs---well I can't say 'Little' anymore, can I? They all had one of them hanging off of 'em. Glad I wasn't out in that storm!"

     "It wasn't as bad as Mother Gosse herself," adds Tony Lamont, another firefighter, "She had one of those harness things over her head---made that wide-eyed goose of her's look awful worried."

     But Mayor Wendy Mathenson didn't find the impromtu ribald decorations humorous and she reminded Police Chief Oscar Jones about Wyndam's Decency Ordinance prohibiting any language or displays which may be construed as obscene or indecent by any member of the community. Harding was immediately arrested for violation of the ordinance and vandalism.

     "Mr. Harding took the decision to drive through our town knowing full well what he was carrying as well as the hazardous weather conditions at the time." Mayor Mathenson said, visibly upset. "People in Iowa City might think this sort of thing is funny but Wyndam is a family-oriented community that values its children. Because of Mr. Harding's irresponsibility, I've had to cancel the festival. There's a lot of disappointed children and parents in this town."





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