Wassergott To Explore Submerged Passages

     Five Island Lake, in addition to the other lakes in Northwestern Iowa and Minnesota, were formed during the last Ice Age at the end of the Pleistocene period when the last great glaciers melted one million years ago. Folklore and American Indian legends say that most, if not all of these lakes are connected by vast underground tunnels, which are fed by either the Mississippi River or Lake Michigan.

     Funding for the expedition is being provided by the University of Emmetsburg and Aerodyne Propulsion Laboratories. The exploration will be conducted using a picked crew of marine biologists, archaeologists and paleontologists, and will utilize the U-3036 as exploration vessel.

     When asked why the old German U-Boat would be used instead of a more modern underwater research vessel, Kapitain Wassergott said "She's a good boat. She was designed for this kind of work. Okay, maybe she was really designed to sink Allied shipping, but she's up to it. She'll be able to get through these passages mit keine problem, and if we should run into any of those Loch Ness things, the Mark-34 torpedoes provided by Aerodyne will be more than a match for them."

     Kapitain Wassergott was apparently referring to the reported sightings of Mesozoic-era plesiosaur-like creatures that have plagued these waters for hundreds of years. It is rumored that the expedition's real agenda is to confirm their exisence.

     Professor Ludwig Stoessel denies any such ulterior motives.

     "The plesiosaurs, like those Pteranodons that keep being reported, went extinct 65 million years ago. This voyage is merely for the sake of science."

     When asked why Aerodyne Propulsion Labs, a facility primarily interested in aerospace research and development, was funding an underwater enterprise, Dr. Immelman Stahl, Director of APL, said:

     "Water is the source of all life, and we at Aerodyne want to show the public our commitment to the environment. All one need do is visit our beautiful 500 acre facility northeast of Emmetsburg, and view the chemically treated well-maintained and landscaped lawns, the genetically engineered perfect trees and shrubbery's, and they shall see that Aerodyne is in the forefront of premier environmental preservation and research!"

     Emmetsburg Mayor Norbert Llewots was indeed enthusiastic about the upcoming voyage.

     "It'll be a great thing for Emmetsburg," he said. "If we can find underground passage to all the other communities on all the other lakes, think of the money that can be saved on trade and commerce. A lot of things have happened in our fair city recently, some good, others not so good. This will be a definite feather in our cap after those three unfortunate guys that got killed by that meteor."